Grumps can suck it, it's Friday!

[ides1056]

Forty degrees this morning and fog clouds the view of the forest around, so I lay about instead of heading out with my field mower and saw- shotgun season demands high visibility clothing and it's too much to expect hunters to be discriminating if your status isn't plain as day. I've been working in the woods since returning home from Oregon a month ago. This agrees with me hugely. Three months spent renovating a bathroom was enervating. I am recovered now. For the better part of my life I have been self-employed. Retirement hasn't been an objective. Everyone I know works at something. Divorce is my retirement. It's in process. While I am not happy about this change of course it was the hardest and best decision I have ever made.
One day at a time.
Oh, and I heard from Time yesterday: the ADHX 45 they are replacing my ADHX with is in process and will be shipped next week. I think this is going above and beyond any warranty I've ever been the beneficiary of. They shipped the first bike with 40mm tires that immediately wore grooves into the stays. I sent photos just to let them know this was happening in case there were problems that resulted down the road and changed the rear tire to a 37. They offered a new bike when it came out. I said okay and here we are.
Friday is a good day.

[bigbill]

Like Jay, I went through a divorce in 2018 and basically started my life over in Arizona as an empty-nester as my son left for Annapolis. After the divorce, my IRA was cut in half so I took a high paying, high stress job, to recover financially. I retired from that job last year. Along the way, I met and married a wonderful woman who is an artist, equestrian, and supportive of my retirement life. As Jay noted, everyone does something, even when retired. Since "retiring" last July, I have umpired baseball, taught community college, substitute taught and taught STEM at an Indian School, and this Monday, I start another master's degree.

As far as the 2018 divorce, it was incredibly stressful. My ex and I had agreed to everything, but eventually had to block her number and rely on email. The divorce was necessary and I've never regretted it. My life is good, I get to cycle all summer in Wyoming, mostly MTB here in AZ, and financially, everything is good. The teaching pay is just for "stuff" like another set of carbon wheels for the OPEN, and a tractor for Wyoming. My goal is to live off my military pensions and in a year, spend no more than 4% of my IRA starting this time next year.

Jay's post made me realize how much better my life is now as compared to 2018.

[72gmc]

Had a better week after a few bad weeks. Provided a little help to good people who lost their jobs for reasons that were not theirs to control. Helping made me feel slightly less terrible about it. Watched a college football game, rare for me these days, and my alma mater scored a historic win (an historic win?). Chatted with my dad about the game, then relaxed with my wife and dog. It was the Friday I needed.

[gregl]

Divorce is my retirement. It's in process. While I am not happy about this change of course it was the hardest and best decision I have ever made.
One day at a time.

Like Jay, I went through a divorce in 2018 and basically started my life over in Arizona as an empty-nester as my son left for Annapolis. After the divorce, my IRA was cut in half so I took a high paying, high stress job, to recover financially. I retired from that job last year. Along the way, I met and married a wonderful woman who is an artist, equestrian, and supportive of my retirement life. As Jay noted, everyone does something, even when retired. Since "retiring" last July, I have umpired baseball, taught community college, substitute taught and taught STEM at an Indian School, and this Monday, I start another master's degree.

As far as the 2018 divorce, it was incredibly stressful. My ex and I had agreed to everything, but eventually had to block her number and rely on email. The divorce was necessary and I've never regretted it. My life is good, I get to cycle all summer in Wyoming, mostly MTB here in AZ, and financially, everything is good. The teaching pay is just for "stuff" like another set of carbon wheels for the OPEN, and a tractor for Wyoming. My goal is to live off my military pensions and in a year, spend no more than 4% of my IRA starting this time next year.

Jay's post made me realize how much better my life is now as compared to 2018.

Seems like a common theme this week. I finalized my divorce one year ago. My ex always faced emotional health challenges, but COVID and our current political climate pushed her over the edge. First it was the anti-vax movement, then COVID denial, and finally full-on QAnon cult beliefs. She drove my daughter and I out of her life because we wouldn’t agree with and/or enable her psychosis. I went from zero debt, healthy savings, and imminent retirement to a $200K mortgage and support payments for the next six years. The bright side: my daughter and I are closer than ever. Like Bill, I’m working the high stress job to replenish my retirement savings. I’m streamlining and simplifying all aspects of my life. 2023 was a painful transition year. I hope the changes I have made will make 2024 less stressful and more joyful. Thanks to my velocipede salon friends for great discussions and inspiration.

Greg

[echappist]

Sorry to hear that Greg.

I hope 2024 is a good year for you and your daughter.

[bigbill]

Seems like a common theme this week. I finalized my divorce one year ago. My ex always faced emotional health challenges, but COVID and our current political climate pushed her over the edge. First it was the anti-vax movement, then COVID denial, and finally full-on QAnon cult beliefs. She drove my daughter and I out of her life because we wouldn’t agree with and/or enable her psychosis. I went from zero debt, healthy savings, and imminent retirement to a $200K mortgage and support payments for the next six years. The bright side: my daughter and I are closer than ever. Like Bill, I’m working the high stress job to replenish my retirement savings. I’m streamlining and simplifying all aspects of my life. 2023 was a painful transition year. I hope the changes I have made will make 2024 less stressful and more joyful. Thanks to my velocipede salon friends for great discussions and inspiration.

Greg

In 2020, my wife and I met right before my 55th birthday in May. After knowing each other for about ten days, my son said he needed to come home for the summer because USNA had canceled all the summer programs and switched to online classes. My girlfriend, now wife, and I went to pick him up at the Las Vegas airport, a ghost town. He was one of five passengers from BWI to LAS. Because he spent the summer here, he got to know Terri better than he would have otherwise. They have a great relationship, and he considers this house his home. I always had a great relationship with my son. My relationship with my son became professional during the summer of 2020 when I was working on my MA and working full time. He used my computer command center (three big monitors and a standup desk) for his online classes, and I used it after 5 pm for my school work. We were both up at 5 am each day because his classes started at 9 am on the east coast, 6 am here.

I retired from the Navy before I intended because he needed me there. I've never regretted ending my career earlier. I had to pay for four years of spousal support, which ended last October. He was 18 when we divorced, so neither of us had child support. She quit parenting when he was twelve, and my only regret was not kicking her out at that point. His relationship with his mother is strained at best. She is a heavy pot user and has addiction issues with narcotic painkillers. My wife never had kids; she was a schoolteacher for twenty years and decided she didn't need her own kids. My son always exchanges texts with her, most recently for suggestions on making a dessert for a dinner party. I love that they have that relationship and that he has a good adult female role model. She taught both of us to fly fish and his personal photo in the USNA yearbook was him holding a big brown trout he caught while she was teaching him to cast.

[ides1056]

Seems like a common theme this week. I finalized my divorce one year ago. My ex always faced emotional health challenges, but COVID and our current political climate pushed her over the edge. First it was the anti-vax movement, then COVID denial, and finally full-on QAnon cult beliefs. She drove my daughter and I out of her life because we wouldn’t agree with and/or enable her psychosis. I went from zero debt, healthy savings, and imminent retirement to a $200K mortgage and support payments for the next six years. The bright side: my daughter and I are closer than ever. Like Bill, I’m working the high stress job to replenish my retirement savings. I’m streamlining and simplifying all aspects of my life. 2023 was a painful transition year. I hope the changes I have made will make 2024 less stressful and more joyful. Thanks to my velocipede salon friends for great discussions and inspiration.

Greg

Similar theme: anti-vax, out of control hoarding disorder, shopping addiction.

Filing was the hardest choice I have ever made.